On Friday, President Bush used a speaking opportunity at fundraiser lunch to remind voters why not to vote Democrat.

Did he remind them of how the Democrats are trying to create a disenfranchised population of migrant workers who will be readily available for exploitation by corporations? Oh, oops, no, that's the Republicans.

Did he warn the audience of how the Democrats use dirty tricks and lies to deceive voters? Wait, that's the GOP again. And again. And again...

Did he remind them that the Democrats are so determined to violate the basic freedoms of American citizens that they will silence solid scientific data and withhold sale of medications for political reasons alone? Well, I suppose Bush might be able to speak out against Democrats on these topics, if "Democrats" could be pronounced "Republicans."

Or how about the way Democrats think reproductive choices for women are utterly evil, but the abortion of black babies is a potentially handy means of social engineering? Did Bush point out that the Democratic party continues to back openly racist candidates? He didn't? Hmm, could it be that the party of modern American racism DOESN'T begin with the letter "d"?

Which of the many recent political disasters did Bush focus on? Was it the total failure in dealing with Hurricane Katrina and its aftermath? The growing body of information suggesting that our country is currently fighting a war that was begun with blatant lies and deception? The exploding debt and deficit that have been produced out of what was once a balanced budget and a surplus? The handouts being given to the super-wealthy at the expense of a growing number of impoverished and unemployed Americans?

Obviously our Beloved Leader couldn't talk about any of these issues. The issues, the "facts" if you will, are biased against Republicans. So Bush decided to focus on the one really important topic for the upcoming elections:

He warned the crowd that Democrats will raise taxes and harm the economy if they are elected. "If you want the government in your pocket, vote Democrat," Bush said.

And if you want the government shoved up your pussy, vote Republican. If you want the government deciding when your loved ones live and die, vote Republican. If you want rich companies to be given your tax dollars, which they can then use to buy themselves some more Congressmen, vote Republican.

If you think the last five years have been super, and would like some more please, vote Republican. If you don't, take a page from Savage Love and DTMFA: dump the motherfuckers already.