Keep those legs together, FOR LIBERTY!!!

Out of respect for the March For Choice, in which one in every 300 Americans participated, here are some Not-so-Fun Facts:

The attacks of 9/11 cost 2,752 lives and roughly $16.2 billion in direct damages. In retailation, we have spent 692 American lives to "fight terror," and our monetary bill has long since moved into the hundreds of billions of dollars.

Yet...

In 2001, among all female murder victims in the U.S., 31% were slain by their husbands or boyfriends (Uniform Crime Reports, 2001, FBI). Family violence costs the nation from $5 to $10 billion annually (American Medical Association). Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women between 14 and 41 years of age. Thirty five percent of American women, roughly 5 million citizens of the United States, report having been beaten by a romantic partner.

And how much time and effort are we putting toward this problem? Well, there are three times as many animal shelters in America as there are battered women's shelters. The government's allocation for this little War On Domestic Terror were at their highest back in the days of the Violence Against Women Act, with $1.6 billion being allocated for a period of five years. Currently, less than a quarter billion a year in federal spending goes toward projects that are even remotely related to combating domestic violence.

Yeah, sometimes it feels just a little shitty to be a female American.

Okay, here's another for the "Wha...?" files:

On one of my rambles through the fetid back alley of society we call the internet, I happened upon a site dedicated to the charitable cause of raising Rapture awareness. These kind souls make it their mission to get the good word out on the as-yet-undisclosed day when God will make all the good Christians disappear from the Earth. While one might have a hard time imagining how to top such articles as "Will My Pets Join Me When The End-Time Is Upon Us?" and "Donuts In Heaven," the emails from readers actually manage to trump the site material itself. Here's one I especially like:

"Hi Todd, I had an idea last week filled with urgency to make small stickers (Avery Mail Labels) and stick them everywhere I could get them. When the rapture takes us up, those left behind will surely be going through the “stuff” we leave behind, especially our billfolds and homes. I took the liberty to refer everyone to your site. You might want to encourage others to do something similar. I have the stickers on my computer, in my wallet, in our truck, over my computer at work and anywhere else I can get away with sticking them. The stickers read: “If those around you suddenly vanish, go to www.raptureready.com on the internet. Look under "Left Behind" This will give you information as to what has happened and what you need to do next.” I hope this will help in some small way to get the word out."

Nice of the fellow to label everything he can, so we all know what not to touch if we are trying to avoid the full-blown-batshit-crazy virus he suffers from. And if following the trail of stickers turns out to be a little more than you can handle, the site founder has provided an even simpler way for you to sort out your place in the Rapture.

Ah, good times.

Went to Jersey for the weekend and got to see two interesting productions about a battle royal between the risen dead and a red guy with horns: the new Hellboy movie and a Methodist Easter service. Fine family fun on both counts, and I am proud to say that I own action figures of the main protagonist from both shows. I spent most of the afternoon making them fight.

Here's a new addition to the list of things that make me go "What the...?"

Today I learned (from Joe) that:

1. The Communist Party website sells tee-shirts and Karl Marx lunchboxes. Keep in mind what popular American "-ism" they spend their time denouncing.

2. The Ayn Rand institute- the world's only organization dedicated to the intellectual defense of Capitalisim and selfishness- is a non-profit organization.

We hear so much about "near-death experiences" and people who make mystical trips down corridors of light, but now there's a charmingly atheist story of near-death drama.

72-year-old Claire Rayner spent three weeks in intensive care, sunk into a coma and suffering from pneumonia, septicaemia, kidney failure and immune system breakdown. But rather than finding Jesus, like so many of the world's suffering and desperate people, Rayner had this to say about her experience:

"I tell you something, in case anyone wonders, not a single out-of-body experience, no long corridors of light, I was an atheist when it started and I've remained one. People used to say to me, 'You wait until something really bad happens, you'll start praying', but I didn't and I can't. I don't put this down to any superior being, I put it down to the superb training and skill of the people looking after me. I remain the humanist I always was."

I find that roughly ten bazillion times more uplifting than any tale of angels and suspiciously Caucasian messiahs awaiting my newly bewinged and harp-laden self in a golden cloud city.